What a ride, the season finale of The Bachelorette.
To think of where we started and came from, all of the drama and ups and downs that this season has brought us.
We started with crazy Clare who social media stalked Dale prior to the show and ruined it for everyone. And we ended up with Tayshia who should have been the first and only choice by far.
The finale was another back to back episode installment that I will basically be covering with one blog. It shouldn’t be that hard since we have only a handful of guys to talk about.
But Tayshia does in fact have her fiancé and has found love at the end of this season. So congrats to her.
Let’s kick off what happened shall we?
It’s fantasy suite week. A chance for the couples to really expand on their relationship and feelings for each other.
Ivan gets to go first which makes him pumped for some reason. I feel like being first in this game isn’t always the best, sometimes it’s the last impression that hits hardest.
I mean sure, it could mean that you’re the favorite and they want to see you first. But I think of it a different way.
When you go to a restaurant are you there to eat the appetizer or the main course? I’ve never gone to Applebee’s strictly for their mozzarella sticks. Maybe my ideology is more, save the best for last, but going first isn’t a win in my book.
But Ivan and Tayshia set the world record for longest kiss in a cold tub.
Man will that be a tough thing for Ivan to explain to his next girlfriend.
“So not only have a I dated the Bachelorette before, but… We also sort of hold a world record together.”
— autumñ (@semiautumnmatic) December 22, 2020
Also we were introduced to the fan favorite, Big Paulie. Who nobody knows who he is. My guess is he’s a camera guy who won the season sweepstakes of getting to be on the show with Chris Harrison.
— saint sagittarius (@HoleScandal) December 22, 2020
Which brings us to the night cap. Which is the real reason we watch fantasy suites night.
I like Ivan, he seems like a nice dude. But he definitely takes things farther than they actually are. Or believes in them more than they are.
He thinks going first is the end all be all of the competition here. And then he tells Tayshia that he is falling in love with her. To which she says “Awwww I’m falling for you too.”
That’s not me trying to dance around it, that’s literally what she says. But cut to a solo shot of Ivan smiling and saying “WE BOTH SAID I LOVE YOU!”
No, no, no you didn’t buddy.
My wife and I caught that, we thought it was awkward that she most definitely didn’t say it back, but Ivan ran with it. He’s got confidence I’ll give him that.
But as you are all wondering, yes they had sex. In a trailer. I get that they have to make things different this season in quarantine. But Ivan got a trailer for his fantasy suite. A literal trailer.
— Sarah (@sar_endipity61) December 22, 2020
the producers I guess were going for a camping vibe, but come on. You are on a luxurious resort and a trailer is the best you can do?
Ivan goes back to the boys all smiles. And wink, wink, nod, nod. Tell me you had sex without telling me that you had sex sort of thing going on.
Which the other two guys, Zac and Brenden are like “oh yeah there are two other guys here.’
That brings us to Zac’s date. His date card said “Let’s explore each other” to which he was super giddy about it and couldn’t stop telling everyone what it said.
Ivan literally gets back all smiles and Zac is like smacking the date card in his face saying “It says let’s explore each other! Can you believe that?!?!”
The date then consists of Zac and Tayshia getting all painted up with their bodies and rolling around making out on a canvas.
Ivan gets an ice cold tub, and Zac gets to paint wrestle half naked with Tayshia. Does this game seem fair?
Later during dinner, Zac drops the Love word at Tayshia as well.
However this time Tayshia says it immediately back to him. Yikes for Ivan.
While Ivan got the friend zone “awwww that’s cute buddy” Zac got the “hell yeah I love you too.”
I find it somewhat comical that the love word only comes out when it’s time to step it up on this show. We saw Bennett drop it when he came back in shocking fashion to try and swing things in his favor. Now we see the guys telling her they love her when sex is on the line.
Zac gets invited to the fantasy suite, and his is a five star hotel compared to Ivan’s trailer park of love. That just wasn’t fair, but I’m guessing the producers also sort of know which way Tayshia is leaning, they just edit it for us to be surprised.
— Simona (@simona_ka) December 22, 2020
And yes Zac and Tayshia have sex.
Too Much Heat in the Kitchen
This brings us to our third and final fantasy suite and it’s Brenden. Like I said, sometimes it’s best to go last. Or sometimes it’s not because it allows the producers to cook up a date that preys on your biggest fears.
Brenden has been skeptical of actually having to propose this entire time since like Tayshia he has also already been married. He understands the severity of an engagement at the end of this show, and it is freaking him out.
He is also trying to handle the fact that your fiancé might have been intimate, making relations, with other men just mere days before you get engaged? That’s just messed up when you actually think about it.
So his date would obviously be one where they settle those issues and fears right? NOPE.
The exact opposite for the poor man. They intensify those fears and his date is looking at engagement and wedding rings with Tayshia. Just shoving all of his doubts and fears right into the poor guys face. As the date goes on you can just see he is the very definition of the word shook.
Perhaps it was for the best. Because at dinner, Brenden is obviously not himself.
He explains that the date truly opened his eyes to the fact of what she was going to be asking him to do. And that after some internal soul searching, he realized that he is not truly ready for that.
It was truly heartbreaking to watch. To see a man who was very confident heading into this episode and a fan favorite because he is so vulnerable come to the realization that he is still broken and still has things to work on.
I applaud Brenden. While the other men are dropping the L word to drop Tayshia’s pants, he is here saying that he can’t commit to what she’s asking.
Think of someone like Chasen who probably would say anything to get a night with Tayshia. And then here is Brenden, saying that he can’t do it.
And it breaks Tayshia’s heart as Brenden drives away she admits that she could of seen herself with him at the end of all this. It was a truly tough goodbye.
Guess Who’s Back, Back Again
Oh this season has been like Star Wars in that no one is ever truly dead and gone. You think they are but they’re not. Darth Maul, so not dead. The Emperor? Just cloned or whatever. Boba Fett in a Sarlac pit? Ha, yeah right.
They’ll bring back Qui-Gon Jinn in one of the new spin off shows, I bet you $20.
So to zero surprise, guess who is back? Ben.
Remember last week, Ben couldn’t muster the strength to tell Tayshia he loved her after his motherboard emotion chip deemed that love was the correct thing to feel.
Well now he comes back to, you guessed it tell her that he loves her.
When Tayshia opens the door you can even tell she’s like “oh lord, this again?”
This is the second time Ben has come to see her, unannounced in the middle of the night and the second time someone she has sent home has come back.
Ben finally admits his feelings. Tayshia invites him to the rose ceremony where two of the three men will be moving on and one gets sent home.
If Not Me Then No One
So three guys at the rose ceremony with Zac, Ivan and all of a sudden from the clouds, Ben. If you are Ivan and Zac right now you have to be thinking “Oh come on!” when you see someone who was shipped away last week return for another chance.
Tayshia doesn’t hand out any roses however. In true Tayshia fashion she pulls the “Can I see you in my office” card, on Ivan.
It seems like the main issue between the two of them was religion.
Which is indirectly something Tayshia had talked about earlier. That there were going to be tough conversations to have about say religion, family, and where do we live? Who quits their job to move? Things that you don’t think about because you are on a television show at the time but then eventually the real world does come back into play.
A tough break up sure but again from what I said earlier, Ivan is a little too confident in himself for me to be fully on board with him.
As he drives away he basically says “Well if it wasn’t me, she won’t pick anybody.”
Okay, slow your roll there dude, you aren’t that great. Perhaps that’s his defense mechanism of how to cope with things like this. But from the fantasy suite when she didn’t ever say the word “love” and he took it as that she basically did. He lives in a slightly altered reality than the rest of us.
So it’s down to Ben and Zac. Ben threw a Hail Mary and it was caught in the end zone and he’s somehow down to the final two. And Zac who has been there all along.
It’s now time for them to meet Tayshia’s parents. And nothing crazy happens here. Pretty boring actually. The only fun part was Tayshia telling her parents that Ben went to West Point for college. To which her parents responded with “Go Navy, Beat Army.”
College football rivalries live on even in the Bachelorette.
Sorry to the Adams’ but Ben got the last laugh this year.
Quick sidebar, this is a perfect example as to why college sports are simply the best. Tayshia doesn’t introduce her boyfriend as “Hey Mom and Dad guess who is a Steelers fan.” And they respond with whatever a Ravens fan would say.
No she mentions that he went to West Point and immediately there is a classic phrase that lets him know what side they’re on. College rivalries never die, you just don’t get that in professional sports.
And Army and Navy aren’t exactly in the conversation for the college football playoff either and probably never will be. Yet it is such a heated rivalry that even out of context, on a television show, in California, during the summer before the season even begins, when you meet someone that went to your schools rival you gotta immediately tell them in short order “Go F**K yourself.”
With that being said, go listen to my podcast Verbally Committed where I talk about college sports on a weekly basis.
Tayshia’s parents like both guys so we get no extra clarity there.
However, Tayshia’s Dad does make a surprise appearance to her villa and in a way basically tells her he thinks the entire process might be a mistake. Since she’s been already married etc. He doesn’t want to see her go down that path again.
Which in a way only confuses Tayshia more. Since she was hoping her family would provide some clarity.
But one final quick date with Zac where they go dancing clears up any of her previous concerns.
A Final Goodbye
Tayshia has given herself the clarity she needs to know that Zac Clark is the one for her. But there is one final loose end to tie up.
So goodbye one final time to Ben. Impressive that he made it this far but I guess when you know, you just know.
Sucks that she brought him back just to send him packing a few days later but hey she got the clarity she needed and it just wasn’t meant to be Benny Boy.
Mr. & Mrs. Clark
Oh my goodness, LONGEST. PROPOSAL. EVER.
They each had like 10 minute monologues prepared for this event. I though something was going to go down when we came back from commercial with like 20 minutes left to go. I thought something crazy like Chris Harrison has been promising me is going to happen.
Seriously, credit Chris Harrison for building up the drama in his voice over work.
“Coming up next a finale you are not going to believe!”
When coming up next we all knew was Zac proposing to Tayshia.
He made me think for a moment, maybe, just maybe.
And there was a moment when Tayshia in the middle of her monologue dropped a “but….” and a long pause but then proceeded to keep talking about how she loved Zac.
Makes me wonder if there is an ear bud in Tayshia’s ear telling her what to say, a producer behind the bushes telling her “Okay now drop a but, and a 10 second dramatic pause and then tell him you love him and yes you will marry him.”
Zac also made all of us men feel foolish. He had to have an ear piece too, no man actually speaks like that with “I’ll choose you today, tomorrow, in a week, a month, a year and forever.” Come on bro, that doesn’t help the rest of us.
By the way, pour one out for Zac’s 6th grade girlfriend that he cheated on.
— Stephanie (@scde_de) December 23, 2020
And for Zac’s ex-wife too. I wonder what she thinks of all this.
Also, I never brought it up before, and I’m sure it’s nothing in his control but I have to say it, or it will bug me forever. Enjoy that lisp Tayshia.
I’m sorry but I don’t know if I could handle marrying someone with that much of a lisp as Zac has. That’s every day and every s or f sound you hear for the rest of your life.
Maybe it’s one of those things she doesn’t even notice till someone points it out to her and then it’s all she’s going to be able to hear. That would suck.
But congratulations to Zac and Tayshia, they love each other yayyyy.
Now what do I do with my Tuesday nights?
Season MVP: Tayshia Adams
Not sure if I ever gave her episode MVP but eh that doesn’t matter. Can you tell me the weekly player of the week in the NFL during week five? No because it doesn’t matter.
She gets season MVP and by a landslide. Before Tayshia we had Peter from last season who had the maturity of an egg plant. And this season we seemingly had Clare who has the grace and sanity of Bill Walton.
And sure while the drama was fun for a time, you also stop rooting for those people rather quickly and whatever love they do find seems hollow.
Tayshia saved this season and was by far the best choice the producers could of made. It’s a shame really it had to happen under these circumstances. We were robbed of a few weeks without Tayshia. She certainly deserved her own entire season from start to finish.
But as Gandalf the Grey would say, that is not for us to decide.
But a tip of the cap to Tayshia Adams, who somehow gave us good entertainment in the middle of a pandemic and has a strong case for the Bachelorette Hall of Fame.
In like no time at all, here comes The Bachelor with Matt James.
Not sure if I will do recaps for this one as well, but if you feel the want and or need to reach out and tell me that I should then perhaps I will.
Other wise thanks for joining me on, as they would say in the show, this journey/experience.
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