You Never Said No Takesies Backsies – I Officially Don’t Want Coronavirus

Listen… we all say things that we don’t mean.  “I am only going out for one drink”, ” I’m 5’10”, “I like long walks on the beach”, “I kind of want the Coronavirus”.  Ya know just classic gags.  I said that over 2 full weeks ago- I can’t be expected to answer to the things I said back then.  We were young and naive. I didn’t know any better.  When I wrote that this whole thing was a joke, it practically didn’t even exist.  I didn’t have a care in the world.  Going into bars and restaurants, just mucking it up with strangers willy nilly.  Now you are telling me this thing is so bad that I should be staying 6 feet away from everyone?  Count me out.  That’s my official stance and I am not afraid to say it.

*everyone erupts into a thunderous applause* “Wow he’s so brave” – says an onlooker.

But this is not about who is coming out and denouncing Coronavirus and who isn’t.  If it was then I would point out that I am one of the courageous ones speaking out against this virus.  But it’s not so lets stay focused here.  This is about me saying that I do not want Coronavirus and you shouldn’t either.  Look at what’s happening in Italy!

That brave soul went all the way to il supermercato just to find out there’s no pasta??  I want no part of this heartless virus.  It is truly disgusting.  Speaking of truly disgusting it also gave us one of the most unnecessary and cringe worthy videos these two eyes ever did see.

I almost didn’t even put the video in that’s how much this video sucks.  Honestly I am the victim here because I like some of those actors.  Now what do I do?  I can’t just pretend I didn’t see them in that video.  Please send your thoughts and prayers.  And for the love of God please send your thoughts and prayers to O.J. Simpson who seems to be taking this the hardest of us all.

But for real this is serious and people should be taking the proper precautions.  Wash your hands, don’t touch your face, practice social distancing, and don’t go to the emergency room if you are not actually sick.  The emergency rooms are overwhelmed and you are just putting yourself at more of a risk by being there.  And most importantly do not under any circumstances be like any of these people.

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-Jon Sensi (@jon_sensi)

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