We all have our favorite cartoon shows and characters we loved and adored as children. Many of these characters and shows stay with us into adulthood and they’ll always hold a special place in our hearts. No matter when you grew up, if someone asks you what cartoons were your favorite you’ll start to rattle them off and go down memory lane.
This week, the gents on the “Legends Lingo” Podcast which can be found exclusively here at Couch Guy Sports held a draft. The draft consisted of cartoon characters from when they were growing up. Powder held the first overall pick with Fiesta picking second and Al getting the third pick. Unlike the NFL Draft, this animated draft will only feature five rounds and like any draft, there must be a recap as to how the guys made out.
I’ll start off by saying I am not the Todd McShay of cartoon characters, if anything I’ll give you some Lee Corso type analysis. If we were doing a draft on Corso and his choices of headgear, the number one overall pick would have to be when he yelled this is Sparta and wore the head of the Michigan State Spartans mascot Sparty. As I am writing this, I literally have the ESPN NFL Draft song in my head and I’m getting fired up for a draft, but I need to remind myself this is cartoon characters and not the NFL.
Ok, let’s get back at the topic at hand shall we.
The First Round Picks
When a team lands the coveted number one overall selection in the draft it’s meant to find you that franchise player. The player you’ll build you’re program around for 10 plus years or more. This player is the building block, the first step in building a future champion. Powder had the pressure of selecting that character. The character to set the tone for the rest of the draft. We all remember the decisions of drafts past, Peyton Manning or Ryan Leaf, Drew Bledsoe or Rick Mirer, who would Powder take No. 1 overall?!
Talk about the most underwhelming No. 1 pick in the history of any draft. Timmy Turner‘s name was on the card he would turn into the commissioner for the draft. Turner who is known for wishing for anything he wants from his Fairy Godparents was an absolute stretch at No. 1. I haven’t seen a reach like this since Don Sweeney selected Zach Senyshyn 15th overall in the 2015 draft.
You alrwady know the answer https://t.co/58Js4aatwv
— Thomas Powder Cadmus (@powder42308) June 26, 2020
Here’s a quick look at other disappointing No. 1 overall picks in sports draft history:
- Toronto Raptors select Andre Bargnani in 2006.
- Sacramento Kings select Pervis Ellison in 1989.
- Los Angeles Clippers select Michael Olowokandi in 1998.
- Oakland Raiders select JaMarcus Russell in 2007.
Now Timmy Turner joins a list of disappointments when he should have been a later round pick or even an up drafted free agent.
Fiesta would go on and take an icon at No. 2, a legitimate heavyweight in Homer Simpson. While Powder had the “d’oh” moment with the first pick, the world came back into balance with this pick. Simpson who has held over 180 jobs in his life, holds one of the most important jobs in Springfield at the Nuclear Power Plant and isn’t afraid to throw down with his son Bart from time to time. In addition, Simpson’s character was cited by USA Today as being one of the “top 25 most influential people of the past 25 years” in 2007. That’s how you make a pick in the draft, you go out and get an icon.
Al would end the first round selecting Peter Griffin with the No. 3 overall pick in the first round. Phenomenal pick. Bravo. “Whoa, Whoa… Lois, This Is Not My Batman Glass”, no Peter it’s not, this is Al executing his plan making this pick, Griffin makes Family Guy the show we all know and love. Peter’s idiocy has no boundaries and sets the tone for many laughs throughout the series. Peter Griffin is one of my favorite characters, ever. Stewie would have been a good wildcard here as well.
Personally, if I held the top overall pick, I would have gone with Bugs Bunny. Arguably the most recognizable character in the world. Maybe this is a safe pick, but again, you should be taken horses not ponies with the No. 1 pick. He is the most famous rabbit on the planet, get in line Roger. He holds one of the most iconic catchphrases in TV history with “What’s up, Doc?”. Any bunny rocking a Brooklyn accent that causes hi jinx is aces in my book. Now that’s a No. 1 overall pick.
Rest of the Draft
The rest of the draft went as followed:
Powder: Timmy Turner, Shaggy, Popeye, Tom the Cat, Blue
Draft Grade: C
Fiesta: Homer Simpson, Batman, Spongebob, Dexter, Courage the Cowardly Dog
Draft Grade: A-
Al: Peter Griffin, Jimmy Neutron, Skeeter Valentine, Arnold (Hey Arnold), Eric Cartman
Draft Grade: B
Clearly Fiesta won this draft, I don’t care what the masses voted on the official poll, Fiesta was playing chess while the rest were playing checkers. Solid picks of Batman and Spongebob to go with Homer. Solid draft.
There you have it, a draft recap from the latest “Legends Lingo” Podcast which can be found on iTunes, I recommend checking it out. This draft will forever be judged in Couch Guy lore and Timmy Turner will forever be etched in Legends Lingo infamy.
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-Chris Henrique (@ChrisHenrique)