I’m Speaking For All of New England When I Say Tom Brady Should Cut the Crap And Not Go Skiing

Tom Brady posted this video today on his Instagram talking about his upcoming ski trip to Montana with the family. Great, a nice little family getaway right before the snow disappears. And Tom Brady wouldn’t be Tom Brady if he didn’t study film beforehand, right?

Yeah Tom. I’m gonna speak for all of New England and kindly ask you to cut the shit and not go skiing. #Patriots pic.twitter.com/d30ChfNTXP

— Couch Guy Sports (@CouchGuySports) March 15, 2019

Tom, look. I’m talking directly to you now because as we know, Tom Brady is an avid reader of Couch Guy Sports. I’m speaking for the entire New England region when I say to cut the crap and DO NOT go risk that God damn beautiful, perfectly shaped arm.

I don’t care if it’s the offseason. The fact of the matter is, Tom isn’t over here in his early 30s where he’d probably heal up pretty quick. He’s a 41-year-old God who might need a little extra time to heal. Is it too much for me,  a Patriots fan, to ask Tom to stay healthy so the team can go win their seventh Super Bowl? I mean, I don’t think so. People who think that Patriots fans are bored with winning are mindless fools. Tired of winning? HA. Please.

Tom Brady going barreling over that hill and wiping out was not something I needed to see today. It’s been a stressful day so far. So I hop on Instagram to take a little break from reality. And now I’m seeing Tom God damn Brady getting smoked on the mountain? What are we doing here!?

Tom, please, I’m begging you. At least consider eating your kale salad in the lodge while the family skis. We have championships to win and let’s be honest, your weapons aren’t exactly top of the game.

-Nick Quaglia (@NickQuag)