YOU’RE NOT SOCIAL DISTANCING!!!!

Oh no… This can’t be good.  Normally I am all for a good old fashion fake baseball fight.  The benches clear, everyone pushes each other, somebody’s jersey inexplicably gets ripped.  It’s pure, it’s graceful, it’s fun for the whole family.  Not to mention the bullpens getting there comically late.  What a hoot that is for me.  Every time.  Tom Cadmus gave a quick recap of the actual action here.  Apparently Alex Clintron, the Astros’ hitting coach, made derogatory comments about Ramon Laureano’s mom. I bet Clintron never even met Mrs. Laureano.  I am sure she’s a lovely lady.  There’s no reason to get her involved.  Apologies ma’am.

With that being said I do have a bone to pick with your son.  Fighting!?  During the COVID-19 pandemic?! Do you know with this means?  I said before that I normally love a benches clearing fight but this time feels different.  It feels dirty.  There are implications and consequences beyond this little spat.  If we don’t all some together and be socially responsible, wear our masks, and stay six feet apart I am not sure that everyone understands the seriousness of our transgressions.  They might cancel college football! *gasp*

Don’t you sons of bitches (again not speaking of Mrs. Laureano here) do this to me.  I love baseball, I played it my entire life.  But you will not take away my college football. The MAC has already been taken away for this season isn’t that enough?  Can’t the suffering stop there?  The noon parlay loss that leads to the 3:00 parlay chase, that leads into the night game parlay last ditch effort, taking us straight into the watching Hawaii kick off at 11 p.m. and I might have a problem game.  These are staples of my fall.  Don’t you dare take that joy from me.  Laureano was right, Clintron is a loser.  Stay in your own dugout loser.  I have football to watch!

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-Jon Sensi (@jon_sensi)