WHOOOOOOOOOOO lives in a pineapple under the sea! SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!
Today we are taking a different approach to my article. We usually discuss the Mets (maybe a little too much) or the Rangers, but today we are looking at the most impressive athletic feats in Spongebob. I will be focusing on mostly on the earlier seasons so I may miss some from more recent episodes. We will also not be taking into account water resistance. With that said, let’s get into it.
Sandy’s Anchor Toss
This might be the single most impressive feat in the whole series. To understand how impressive this is, you need to keep a couple things in mind: an average squirrel weighs around 1 pound and the average anchor weighs in the thousands of pounds. Not only was Sandy able to out toss Muscle Bob Puffpants and Larry the Lobster, she kicked it and was able to control it in the air to land on the judge. We all know Sandy is a top notch scientist and the strongest character in the show, but to be able to do what she did to that anchor is top notch.
Patrick’s Chocolate Dipped Strawberry Cone
The only athletic competition that rivals the Fry Cook Games is the Olympics. Only the best athletes are invited to participate and we were not disappointed in the performances. Patrick Star was a late addition to the competition. Not only was Patrick a late addition, but also he put on one of the most impressive performances of the contest. Patrick showed out in the high dive competition. He had perfect form as he dove straight into the chocolate sauce and came out as a chocolate dipped strawberry cone. Like I said, his performance rivaled that of Olympic divers.
Spongebob and Squidward Drag Ships
Next, we will discuss the race for employee of the month. Squidward and Spongebob race to the Krusty Krab to prove who is truly the employee of the month. Along that race, we see them pull themselves on anchors and drag pirate ships across the sea floor. Squidward weighs a hefty 110 pounds. For reference, the Mayflower weighed around 360,000 pounds so most pirate ships would probably be comparable. In the world’s strongest man competition, we often see them pull buses or even airplanes, but those are beefy men and not lanky squids.
Listen, I know there are some others, but we don’t have time to cover them all in one article. We may be looking at a short series down the road covering Larry the Lobster and his weight lifting buddies. Obviously there is no rhyme or reason to any of these feats, but they are still impressive none the less, especially for small undersea creatures.
-Pete Chatterton (@Pchat12)
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