Ted Cruz and Jimmy Kimmel’s Basketball Game Aired Last Night And Kimmel May Now Have To Leave Television

This game had been built up for a little bit. Early on favorite without checking out any odds had to have been Jimmy Kimmel. Low key surprising fact, Jimmy Kimmel is actually older than Ted Cruz by 3-years (shoutout Hollywood), but he’s obviously in better shape at least aesthetically. Cruz is one of those guys who looks like he has constant B.O. He’s a straight up sack of potatoes. Nothing against the guy, that’s just what I’m seeing.

So I expect Kimmel to win over Cruz. I just did. Ted Cruz even played some mind games dropping this FIRE practice tape where he couldn’t make a shot.

Am working hard to get ready for the big game on Saturday. @jimmykimmel — are you scared yet? I’m playing better than ever. #unstoppable #KimmelvsCruz pic.twitter.com/XklHueCjpO

— Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) June 14, 2018

But let me tell you. Cruz came out FIRING dropping hook shots, jump shots where he never left the ground and opened the game with a hard drive to the basket like he’s Boogie Cousins if Boogie was secretly the Zodiac Killer. ‘Sup conspiracy theories?

The game though…

Honestly, if you’ve never been to the YMCA on a Saturday morning, this is all you need to see. The only thing that would have made it more authentic would be if they went into the locker room after and made them talk to an old guy who refuses to put on underwear or a towel and talks wayyyyy to close to you.

Obviously, this was for charity which was cool, but I’m high key impressed with Ted Cruz. You could tell that guy could at least semi play basketball back in his day. That skyhook that he took was text book.

Cruz took the game 11-9 and Kimmel had to donate $5,000 to charity. To my title though, does Jimmy Kimmel need to retire from television now? Talking political smack on the court WHILE you look an athletic competition to TED CRUZ. Big loss for Jimmy. Sure, Britney Spears came back after her 2007 meltdown. But this… Man, I don’t know if this comeback is doable.

-Nick Quaglia (@NickQuag)