When Purdue started their NCAA tournament run on Friday, nobody knew who Matt Haarms was. I mean the guy is a backup center who averages less than five points a game. By the end of the weekend, everyone in the country knew who Matt Haarms (and his hair) was.
I mean, this dude is electric.
America finally gets the #HaarmsHair mix it deserves.
— NCAA March Madness (@marchmadness) March 18, 2018
Does is suck that 9 foot tall Purdue senior and starting center Isaac Haas broke his elbow and will probably miss the rest of the tournament? You bet your ass it does.
But at least we got #HaarmsHair out of it.
Haarms touching his hair so many times is definitely a nervous habit that he’s developed over time, as he even does it during the flow of play. Either that, or he knows he always needs to look fly AF because future Mrs. Haarms is out there watching.
Either way, I’m gonna make a bold suggestion for y’all. When you and your friends watch Purdue take on Texas Tech on Friday night, use it as a pregame. Play some sort of #HaarmsHair drinking game. Take a shot every time he touches his hair. Shotgun every time he touches his hair. Idk how much you can handle. Just do whatever floats your boat. Whatever you choose to do, there’s a really good chance you’ll be fucked up by halftime.
Haarms might go to a manbun, which is totally unnecessary and would ruin everything. Just get some pomade dude. Haarms wasn’t a big name coming out of high school, so he may not be getting paid. He doesn’t have to go hardcore and get Baxter of California, which is what Gordon Hayward uses. Just go to Target and get a $10 pomade.
Or don’t. We’ll all just keep getting hammered because of you. Works just as well for me. Long live #HaarmsHair.
-Brian Borders (@bborders12)